Fuck that shit
DUDE!!!!!!!!!!!! ur doing great as it is and i know for sure ull be accepted no matter what!!! plus using sherlock holmes as a role model seems AWESOME!!!! hes ingenious soo dont worry about what others say cause i know for sure that ur better than what they will ever be. Do what u believe in and ull succeed for sure and if others try to bring u down by making u lie ur true self, then block them out. probably, they dont know how great sherlock holmes is sooo prove them wrong and be like HA!!!! IN UR FACE X MAUHAHAHHAHA well maybe not like that but u know what i mean =P
Lately, everything I’ve been doing seems as if it’s geared towards college. For example, I’m practicing several difficult piano concertos and classical guitar pieces for upcoming auditions at Harvard and Princeton. However, I only have a month and a half left to memorize and refine them since I’m in Taiwan. The college auditions are something my mother forced me into without really regarding my feelings. And then there are always lectures and brochures at school about how to “best” present oneself to colleges. It makes me feel sick. I feel like I’m lying about who I am, whoring myself out to universities.
Recently, I submitted the personal essays we wrote in Mohney’s class to a college counselor to edit. Even though she complimented my writing, I was highly disappointed by her comments. For the common app prompt (describe a fictional character who has had an influence on you), I chose to write about Sherlock Holmes. I have always been an avid fan of the Holmes chronicles and admire the character greatly. In fact, I invested a lot of time and thought into my personal essay in order to effectively convey why I chose Holmes, out of all the fictional characters in the world, as a role model. I felt that the resulting essay revealed many personal details about myself, especially in how I view the world. Moreover, Holmes seemed like a very unique choice to me; I doubt many other college applicants would have chosen him. I was very proud of both what I wrote and I how I wrote the essay.
Unfortunately, the college counselor and my mother felt differently. Because Holmes was a chronic drug addict, they felt that he was an inappropriate character for me to choose as the subject of my essay. My mother told me that the topic of drugs was a “very sensitive issue in the adult world” and encouraged me to write about a historical figure instead. When I tried to explain that I truly admire Holmes and that my original essay was deeply thought-out, this was her response:
“You’re growing up into the real world, you need to know that you can’t always have your way, that you can’t be an idealist. Yes, we should be honest to our true self always, but that doesn’t necessarily mean every other human being in this world appreciates viewing you that way. Why do you prefer bangs over your forehead? You’re not revealing your true self: your pimples. Why do you avoid wearing shorts? You’re not revealing your true self: you’re not confident about your knees. You see how you are packaging yourself to present a better-looking you? Why can’t you do the same for college application? Do you think admission officers care to know who you truly are? No. Their job is to pick out the winners for their school. I’m not asking you to change yourself. I’m just reminding you that, in life we all subconsciously package ourselves into more presentable ways. In life, a person’s true self is revealed only in crisis. It is only in challenging situation we get to see a person’s un-packaged character.”
BULL. SHIT. I’m not five years old; I know I can’t always get what I want. On the other hand, does that mean I should stop trying? That I should stop caring? I don’t need condescending adults to impose their views of the world on me. I can figure things out for myself; I can make my own mistakes. I think the world needs idealists, people who are willing to defend their principles. For me, this essay isn’t even about ideals or anything as lofty as that. I just don’t want to bullshit colleges. College is supposed to be the start of something new and exciting; I don’t want to begin it by lying and hiding things about myself. Packaging myself? I’m not a fucking can of sardines. Is that what’s truly important? Of course, I know that I wear nice clothes and comb my hair a certain way because I’m scared of what people will think, but that doesn’t mean I should do that for college too. My mother is trying to encourage a bad habit. I’m trying to change by being less afraid to show my true self.
Moreover, if the minor detail of writing an essay about Sherlock Holmes will ruin my chances of being accepted into Harvard, I’d rather not go anyway. A school that is so narrow-minded as to reject me based on a drug-addicted, fictional character is not one that I’d want to spend four years at. If I’d chosen a real-life figure, such as Bob Marley, who was addicted to drugs, would that have been any better? Just because I admire Holmes doesn’t mean I’m a drug addict too. Don’t be ridiculous. I like rock music, so does that mean I’ve had sex? Don’t jump to conclusions.
I’m not a genius, but nor am I stupid. I study hard, I have strong grades, I am decently talented. Maybe I won’t get into Harvard, Stanford, Columbia, or Princeton, but I know I will get into a good university. So why can’t everyone else have a little faith in me? My essay won’t completely restrict me from attending an Ivy League or anything like that. Everything will be okay. All I’m asking is for my mother to trust my decision… especially since this is my future we’re talking about. I should have a say in it.
What happens to adults when they grow up? Do they all become cynical and scoff at idealism? When they were kids, did they dream of changing the world, like I do now? Why do people insist there is a tremendous gap between the child world and adult world? There really shouldn’t be. How scary. I never want to be like my mother. I want to believe that all my wildest fantasies can come true as long as I try. I want to believe that I can make a difference in the world. I want to be simple and innocent to the point of stupidity.
This may seem a petty thing to get so pissed off about, but it’s something that matters to me. My essay not be a masterpiece, but I like it; it represents a part of me that I’m willing to share with colleges. If they’re too dense to appreciate it, then screw them. College applications are stressful enough; i just want to have this one little piece of rebellion for myself.
Via: Journey to the stars
